Three Ways To Deal When You’ve Been Dumped

10:24 AM Robot Love 0 Comments

You just can't let him go, can you?
Sigh. It’s happened again. Just when you thought things between you and the Mr. couldn’t be better, he’s gone and dropped you like a bowl of liquid poop after a night of heavy drinking. Whether you’ve been dating for a couple of days or if you’ve been fondling those balls for years on end, break ups tend feel like they are the end of the world. You weren’t enough for this one, and you have a hard time believing you’ll be enough for anyone else. You’re at the point in your life where you constantly need to ask yourself, what is the point of feeling feelings if the only feelings you ever feel end in feeling complete and utter despair?

Your friends won’t answer your calls because they think it’s time you moved on (“you only knew him for like a week!” they bitchily remind you). Your mom never calls you back anyway, even when things are going great. You’ve maxed out your PTO and you’re not even close to turning the corner. You are wallowing, and there’s nothing anyone can do to stop you. WELL LISTEN UP!! You need to stop being such a pathetic, moaning worm. It’s disgusting and it gives women a bad reputation. Your first mistake was giving yourself the free time to give a single shit about a person who thinks less of you than that pair of jeans he’s had since he was 14 years old, and your second mistake was not immediately pulling yourself up by your thong straps and moving on. But you’re, hopefully, a beginner in The Dating Game, so we will cut you some slack. This week we’ll take a look into the world of break ups, starting with the three easy ways to get over your boo when you haven’t been hardwired to move on naturally.

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Choosing Your Best Diet Adventure

8:17 AM Robot Love 0 Comments


Being a penis chaser these days usually means feeling insecure about your appearance 99% of the time.  If you've ever picked up a fashion magazine and then looked in the mirror, you know that, even though the doctor says you're healthy, you're actually a disgusting, overweight, cellulite-riddled sack of flab.  The good news is that thanks to our research here at Creep and modern technology, you can change all of that, and there are many ways to go about it.  If you have ever wanted to do something about hating that reflection, we have some tips for you.

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FrEaKy FuMbLeZ: Fantasy Footballing Like A Creep

11:00 AM Robot Love 0 Comments

Follow our advice or you'll look like a rookie.
I just drafted my fantasy football team and I’ve gotta admit: it did not go according to plan. From the gunshot that went off right outside my kitchen window 10 seconds after the draft started, to the internet disconnecting every 30 seconds, forcing me to accidentally autodraft TWO ROOKIE KICKERS, it was an all around difficult experience. If I could do it again, I would have stayed at work where the internet is reliable and the pizza is free. As it was, I didn't get to google image search a single player before choosing them, or participate in the witty banter in my league's chat room. Well...you live and learn, and then you lose 30 bucks.  

In the interest of saving you a major headache and a minor chunk of change, we have compiled our best advice for this year's fantasy football season. You don't have to be a football fan to get some "bang" for your buck. With our advice and a little luck, you will have the fantasy football season of a lifetime. 

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