Hot N Sexy Pumpkin Stencils


Condom + Safety Pin = Recipe for Romance
Most of us think Halloween is just a time when prostitutes come out to play. We admit, turning tricks for treats is an integral part of this magical holiday, but hooking is only half of why Halloween is the perfect time to be thinking about love. Halloween is the one day of the year when all of us Creeps can really be our true selves. From revealing our hot bods in skimpy costumes, to sending our lovers special messages on our pumpkins, there is no better time, this side of February, to work your mojo magic. Read on for some hot pumpkin stencils that will turn up the heat this Halloween.

Closing Your Grand Canyon: A Non-Essential Relationship Shutdown Guide


You could be headed for emotional bankruptcy
You’re exhausted. Your coital resources have been stretched thin. Juggling all these balls has been physically exhausting, and unless your endurance ceiling increases, you are going to have a mob of angry dudes knocking at your front door. You need to mitigate the damage. You need to take a page from the U.S. Government, and shut down all non-essential sexual encounters. Max Landis, our Hunk of the Month, sheds some light on this subject in a recent interview. 

Three Ways To Deal When You’ve Been Dumped

You just can't let him go, can you?
Sigh. It’s happened again. Just when you thought things between you and the Mr. couldn’t be better, he’s gone and dropped you like a bowl of liquid poop after a night of heavy drinking. Whether you’ve been dating for a couple of days or if you’ve been fondling those balls for years on end, break ups tend feel like they are the end of the world. You weren’t enough for this one, and you have a hard time believing you’ll be enough for anyone else. You’re at the point in your life where you constantly need to ask yourself, what is the point of feeling feelings if the only feelings you ever feel end in feeling complete and utter despair?

 Your friends won’t answer your calls because they think it’s time you moved on (“you only knew him for like a week!” they bitchily remind you). Your mom never calls you back anyway, even when things are going great. You’ve maxed out your PTO and you’re not even close to turning the corner. You are wallowing, and there’s nothing anyone can do to stop you. WELL LISTEN UP!! You need to stop being such a pathetic, moaning worm. It’s disgusting and it gives women a bad reputation. Your first mistake was giving yourself the free time to give a single shit about a person who thinks less of you than that pair of jeans he’s had since he was 14 years old, and your second mistake was not immediately pulling yourself up by your thong straps and moving on. But you’re, hopefully, a beginner in The Dating Game, so we will cut you some slack. This week we’ll take a look into the world of break ups, starting with the three easy ways to get over your boo when you haven’t been hardwired to move on naturally.

Choosing Your Best Diet Adventure


Being a penis chaser these days usually means feeling insecure about your appearance 99% of the time.  If you've ever picked up a fashion magazine and then looked in the mirror, you know that, even though the doctor says you're healthy, you're actually a disgusting, overweight, cellulite-riddled sack of flab.  The good news is that thanks to our research here at Creep and modern technology, you can change all of that, and there are many ways to go about it.  If you have ever wanted to do something about hating that reflection, we have some tips for you.

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